Justin Trudeau Announces Plan To Combat "Extremism" By Resigning.
"It's an extreme decision".
Justin Trudeau has resigned.
In what has been a tumultuous, scandal-riddled and surreal reign of weirdness, the decision to resign came as part of his overall objective to end extremism.
“We need to put an end to extremism. That is why I decided to resign” he said cryptically.
“It’s an extreme decision but the correct one,” explained a professor of Political Extremism at the University of Politics Boogaloo. “Let’s blackface it, Justin isn’t exactly talented at uniting people. He may be sharing one too many eggnogs with Joe Biden where that’s concerned.”
As the world’s greatest troll, Trudeau also received the Dale Gribble Award for his “outstanding impersonation of a paranoid conspiracy theorist”.
'Fighting back tears, Trudeau accepted the award. “I worked hard being a sower of discord. I did it for the vaccinated, manic, hypochondriacs and lap-top class. Together we will save the middle-class.”
In other news, Trudeau may not be out of work for long. Rumours are swirling that he and Volodymyr Zelensky - the brave dramatic showman dictator of Ukraine. Hero to the gullible - will be going on a Vaudeville inspired act.
The original plan was to include ventriloquism except they could not decide who would be the puppet as both were proved to be outstanding puppets.
Asked if he had any immediate plans, Trudeau replied, “I dunno. Maybe I’ll crash at the Aga Khan’s house. Or maybe I’ll go visit family in Cuba. I’ve always wanted to visit a sock factory in China. We’ll see”.