Innovative Doctor Set To Implant Dog Ears On Woman Who Identifies As A Dog.

Pushing the boundaries of scientism.

Amanda-Leah Schmidt-Tititonga, 26, of British Columbia, who identifies as a dog is set to become the first recipient of dog ears.

“Ir’s sooo so exciting,” she gleamed to reporters outside Credentialed Clinic Services in Vancouver. “Ever since I was a little girl I wanted to be a dog. Well, actually, I wanted to be a wolf and then a rabbit eventually settling on a dog. My psychiatrist said it’s all normal to swing wildly like this. It’s all part of the process of discovery,” she explained.

A discovery that could not happen without strong family support.

Now for the ears.

“Oh yes, We knew from a young age Amanda was….different,” Schmidy-Titiconga’s mother Jane Playne remembered while she shuffled pictures of her daughter.

“Remember this one, Jack?” pointing to Amanda’s father. He sighs and replies, “Yes, yes. Amanda using the litter box at the pet store.”

After revealing Amanda had seen a series of psychologists with little progress to show for it they quietly stored the pictures and walked out of the room.

Schmidt-Ttitonga is recovering from alcoholism and thinks this is a new path for her. “I’ve been through a lot. I have a lot of support from the experts. Woof, woof!” she added softly chewing on a bone.

What is known about the mercurial and mysterious clinic that agreed to perform the surgery?

Local beat reporter Paul Kandinskisky has long known about the medical facility. “B.C. is always on the cutting edge of experimental scientific advancement. Not much of CCS is known but it has been working quietly and diligently for years on something called ‘compassionate cross-breeding’ surgery as they put it,” he explained.

The community’s support, for its part, is divided.

“Fucken Dogenstein,’ is how one resident described it.

But others were more tolerant as this person reveals. “I believe in scientism. I have no problem with it”.