Crane rental company U-Crane asks public to stop sending canned goods.
"We're not Ukraine".
Rental giant U-Crane has been flooded with canned goods in the wake of the West’s taunting war in Ukraine.
“People don’t seem to know how to spell,” CEO Mike Cranium told Inactive News.
The company rents cranes out to companies hence the name. “U-Crane is like U-Haul. It’s a play on words but the public these days are retarded and ignorant they can’t tell their Juvenal from their Steinbeck anymore,” Cranium said before adding, “Anyway, we have enough peas to feed Ukraine.”
The company said it would donate the food to food banks facing a shortage because of the war in Ukraine. “People have been donating food to Ukraine forgetting we have people in need right here,” according to Father Johnny Savage of the Stale Food Mission.
A spokesperson for the Ukrainian activist group We-Krain asked people to pay close attention to who they’re donating food. ‘For fuck sakes, can’t they see it says U-Crane and not Ukraine?”
Just as the interview with Cranium was concluding, someone passed by and handed a can of corn he repainted in blue and yellow to Cranium. Cranium responded by throwing the can at the back of the person’s head.
“U-fuck,” he muttered under his breath.
If you wish to send food to Ukraine the best place is to drop them off at a local grocery store. “Please stop painting the cans blue and yellow. We need to see the labels,” explained one store owner. “It’s not an art class or an opportunity to virtue signal. Just drop off the food you don’t eat and leave,” she pleaded.